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This is a transcript for the 100th episode of The Geo Team, Ho, Ho, D'oh!

Act 1Edit

(Intro)

(Fades to the title card with animation of Homer as Santa who is giving presents)

(Cuts to a present with the text of the episode's name "Ho, Ho, D'oh!")

Text: Written by BILL OAKLEY, JOHN WEINSTEIN, JAY KOGEN, and WALLACE WOLODARSKY

Text: Storyboard by ALAN SMART and TOM YASUMI

Text: Directed by WES ARCHER, RICH MOORE, ALAN SMART, and TERRY WARD

(Fades to black)

(Fades to the outside of the decorated Geo Team House; Crash and the Once-ler are sitting in front of the door, letting people in)

Crash: (looks at the fun room window; excited) Woah! The party's getting started.

The Once-ler: And unfortunately, we're not partying in there because we're the security guards.

(Geo Girl arrives outside of the base)

Geo Girl: Is my brother's party on?

Crash: Yes.

Geo Girl: Can I come in, please? I was invited.

The Once-ler: Since you're not a Gree Team member, you can.

(Geo Girl goes in the base)

(Cuts to the fun room of the base; the Geo Team are having an party for Geoville's 100th anniversary and they are dancing to the song "U Can't Touch This" by MC Hammer)

Green Bob: Great job, Geo Guy.

Little Guy: Geo Guy, why are we having a non-Christmas party 3 days before Christmas?

Geo Guy: Well, Little Guy, Geoville was founded on December 22, 1898.

Bart Simpson: (talking to Jason) Ay caramba! You've got Gameboy Color too!

Jason: I got it on the day when the GBC came out.

(Lisa Simpson, Coraline and Margo are sitting down together)

Lisa: Don't you hate it when someone ruins your work?

Coraline and Margo: Yes!

Margo: Dave the Minion once scribbled over my homework, and I nearly got detention at school for that.

Lisa: If anyone wants me, I'll be over there getting some punch. (walks away)

Coraline: I want to come with you.

(Cuts to Jan and Homer debating about Santa's existence in the hallway)

Homer: Santa is absolutely real.

Jan: No, he isn't.

Homer: If he isn't real, then why is my dog called Santa's Little Helper and the fact that there's lots of movies about Santa?

Jan: You just named your dog that, and those movies are fictional.

Homer: He's 100% real. I'll prove it to you. (gets his tape recorder)

Jan: (neutral) Oh...

(Homer plays the tape)

Santa (on tape): Ho, Ho, Ho!

Jan: It was probably from a movie.

Homer: (angry) D'oh. I'll prove it to you with MORE evidence. (shows a picture of a guy dressed up as Santa at the mall; neutral) I saw Santa at the mall.

Jan: That's a random guy dressed up as Santa.

Homer: D'oh! I lose and you win!

Jan: Good day to you, Homer. (leaves the base)

(Memy9909, disguised as a man with a mustache and a tuxedo, arrives outside of the base with Pingux2012; Pingux2012 is wearing a mask and a party hat)

Pingux2012: (shouting) MEM-- (normal) Sorry, I meant mister. You look very different.

Memy9909: That's right, stickman. I got a plastic surgery to change my face, and I glued a mustache to my face.

Pingux2012: Why are we here then?

Memy9909: Geo Guy's throwing a party here, so we terrorize the party!

(They laugh evil)

Memy9909: C'mon, stickman. (walks to the door)

(Crash Bandicoot and the Once-ler stop Memy9909 and Pingux2012)

Crash Bandicoot: (shouting) Stop right there!

The Once-ler: Are you on the list?

Memy9909 and Pingux2012: Nope.

Crash Bandicoot: Wait a second, human guy.

Pingux2012: Huh?

Memy9909: What's going on?

Crash Bandicoot: Your voice sounds like Memy's.

Memy9909: (sneering) That's because I am Memy9909!

Crash Bandicoot: Busted!

Pingux2012: (takes off his mask) Oops!

(Crash spins like a tornado and throws the two guys out of the city)

Crash Bandicoot: That will do it.

Act 2 Edit

(Two hours later, Dick Grayson arrives outside of the base)

The Once-ler: Oh, hi, Dick Grayson.

Dick Grayson: Hello.

The Once-ler: How has your Christmas vacation in Geoville been?

Dick: It's been very great! By the way, were those two guys flying Pingux and Memy?

The Once-ler: Yes! (talking to Crash) Crash...

(Crash is playing Pokémon Yellow on the GBC)

Crash: (sad) Oh no, my Charizard has been defeated by Gary's Sandslash.

(The Once-ler grabs the GBC)

Crash: (angry) Hey!

The Once-ler: Crash, you've been ignoring. That is Dick Grayson.

Crash: Oh, hello, Dick Grayson. Since you're a good guy, you're allowed inside!

Dick Grayson: Thank you! (puts on his Robin costume and goes inside)

(Homer Simpson goes to Crash)

Homer: No offense, Crash, but the punch you made was terrible.

Crash: The fighting punch, or the drink punch?

Homer: The drink. It tastes like water with food coloring; Bleh!

(Marge, Bart and Lisa go outside)

Lisa and Bart: (shouting) Dad!

Bart: Why do we have to go home 10 minutes early?

Homer: It's nearly past your bedtime.

Lisa: But it's Christmas break.

Homer: Oh, yeah.

(The Simpsons get into their car)

Crash: Goodbye, the Simpsons!

The Simpsons: Bye!

(Homer drives away)

(Cuts to the Simpsons arriving at their house)

Homer: Guys, we're here.

(The Simpsons minus Homer go inside)

Homer: (sneering) I'll show that kid Jan that Santa's real. (normal) First, I'll win the lottery and pretend to be Santa. Ho, ho, d'oh!

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